Here For the Memories
A thought-provoking audio memoir shorts filled with stories, humor, anecdotes, and commentary on social, cultural, business, and religious issues. Whatever Linden remembers and thinks will entertain, challenge, and inform is a possible subject.
Here For the Memories
Workplace Whimsy: Tales of Rebellion and Common Sense
Ever wondered what might happen if you challenge the status quo in a world obsessed with following the rules? Get ready for a hilariously insightful journey as we visit a series of memorable and somewhat absurd events from my career at a Knoxville-based staffing company. First, we tackle the dot-mapping project that was supposed to revolutionize our recruiting and sales—only to end up revealing the painfully obvious. Through this relatable story, you'll discover how sometimes, the most elaborate plans can boil down to nothing more than common sense, wrapped in a cocoon of corporate absurdity.
Here For the Memories
Here for the memories thought-provoking audio memoir shorts filled with stories, humor, anecdotes and commentary on social, cultural, business and religious issues. Whatever Lyndon remembers and thinks will entertain, challenge and inform is a possible subject. The collection of memories about one's life allows for the development and refinement of a sense of self, including who one is, how one has changed and what one might be like in the future.
Speaker 2:Greetings and salutations. I'm Lyndon Wolfe and welcome to here for the Memories. Today I'm going to share some stories from my career that I hope you find entertaining. Hopefully there will be a moral to be found in them somewhere. One of the things that defines me is my disdain for convention or, to phrase it another way, my challenging of conventional wisdom. Playing by the rules and playing along is obviously not my strong suit, as this tale will reveal.
Speaker 2:After starting a company for a Knoxville, Tennessee-based staffing concern whose success was primarily driven by naivety, at least in my opinion I was given a project for the larger organization. My division focused on professional and technical positions, but the others primarily placed clerical, warehouse and manufacturing workers, pink and blue collar workers. The task was simple Affix colored sticky dots to a map of the city. Each applicant would be represented by either a blue dot or a pink dot and our clients represented by green ones. I'm hopeful you get the symbolism here. Based on their respective addresses and their placement on the map, we were to draw a conclusion that would help guide the overall company's recruiting and sales efforts. My recruiter, gina Evans, and I purchased this massive map, probably about 15 feet by 8 feet, sprawled it on the conference room floor, printed out the requisite lists of worker and client addresses and began to feverishly place dots in their correct location, on and off. We worked for hours literally placing hundreds of dots, so many in fact. You could not see any cross street names. In certain areas there appeared much like a Jackson Pollock painting huge blobs of blue-pink and green. Ugh, I never understood why people think Jackson Pollock was brilliant. It seems to me he just spilled paint on large canvases.
Speaker 2:Well, anyway, once completed, at the next company-wide meeting I was called on to wax eloquent on our findings. I was introduced by the owners, bill and Donna Cobble, with an overview of the project and with muffled fanfare. I strode. Is that correct? I mean, who cares really? But well, if you do care, raise your hand and I'll correct it. Raise your hand and I'll correct it.
Speaker 2:Anyway, I strode to the front of the room while Gina unfurled the dotted map and struggled to keep it open enough for the audience to even view it. After we duct taped it to the wall, gina gestured, like Vanna White, toward our work of art. I cleared my throat, nervous not to invalidate our many hours of hard labor by poor delivery. And now, overly enunciating and projecting my voice, I spoke into existence this powerful synopsis. Are you ready? Our research indicates that the vast majority of our applicants and workers come from residential areas and the vast majority of our clients can workers come from residential areas and the vast majority of our clients can be found in commercial and industrial ones. Thank you.
Speaker 2:I then sat down while Bill and Donna clapped enthusiastically. However, our colleague's response was far more tepid. Maybe they were too impressed to respond Highly unlikely. Now I know I could have been perceived as a smart aleck and I was but I just couldn't, with a straight face, play along with this preposterous exercise. My intention was not to poke fun at Bill and Donna Okay, maybe a little bit but to make a point of a much bigger issue. Although it was borderline inappropriate for the setting, I just couldn't help myself, and this accurately characterizes my attitude toward the ubiquitous blind-following-the-blind landscape of our society and business.
Speaker 2:On another occasion, the Cobbles asked for everyone to recommend a company slogan, even though I was the only employee not to pledge a portion of my check to the United Way, where Donna was the chairperson. That's a different subject for a different day. Obviously, I was politically incorrect. I did participate, however, in this silliness, the slogan silliness. Unfortunately, my suggestion the Cobbles kids have no shoes was not a winner. Shocking. I did two things well there. I made the Cobbles a lot of money and headed up a radio advertising campaign for them as a tool to attract workers for our clients. My tagline we screen people in, not out was a hit and continued to be used for this and other recruitment campaigns for a considerable time. I'm kind of proud.
Speaker 2:Unfortunately, my time there came to a disappointing end, although the company I founded for them was wildly successful. One of their executives, carolyn I won't even mention her last name was dark green with envy, not green, dark green with envy. Anyway, she found out I was pastoring a small church part-time the weekends and went to Bill and Donna with her concerns. She thought I should pick one or the other. Soon, bill and Donna, professing Christians and outspoken churchgoers, acquiesced to Carolyn's demand and they issued me an ultimatum Quit the church or quit us. To their shock, five seconds after the vibration of their words hit my eardrums, I quit them. This is one of too many occasions where professing Christians and church members treated me in a business setting in a manner not worthy of Jesus' name. Well, has my lack of business decorum stunted any additional corporate ladder climbing? Absolutely it has. What would you expect? But it has made my work more fun, mysterious adventure, propelled by the beat of that proverbial drummer, and I would have it no other way.
Speaker 2:I was recently asked a great question in a podcast hosted by the CEO of an on-the-rise company. He said when was the last time you challenged the status quo? My response you might be better off to ask when was the last time? I didn't. What about you? Do you challenge it or do you go with the flow? Do you see the value in being candid and vocal about the absurdities you encounter? Remember your thoughts have value, even if someone doesn't recognize that you too are a voice needing to be heard when things just don't add up. This has been here for the Memories. I'm Lyndon Wolfe and I would like to encourage you to look back on occasions you knew you should have spoken up and draw courage from those memories to do so the next time you know that you should.
