Career Chaos: Untold Tales of Side Hustles

Who would have thought that a red bandana could lead to a potential side gig with the infamous Bloods, all while delivering pizzas? Join Linden Wolfe, as he recounts the hilariously misguided adventures from his eclectic career on this uproarious episode of Here for the Memories.

Each tale offers a unique blend of humor and humility, shedding light on his often chaotic path. Whether you're seeking a hearty laugh or motivation to embrace your own career chaos, this episode is a testament to the unpredictable tapestry of life experiences that shape us. Tune in for a generous dose of comedy, reflection, and the ultimate realization that sometimes, the journey is more entertaining than the destination.

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Transcript

Speaker 1: 0:00

Here for the memories thought-provoking audio memoir shorts filled with stories, humor, anecdotes and commentary on social, cultural, business and religious issues. Whatever Lyndon remembers and thinks will entertain, challenge and inform is a possible subject. The collection of memories about one's life allows for the development and refinement of a sense of self, including who one is, how one has changed and what one might be like in the future.

Speaker 2: 0:34

Greetings and salutations. This is Lyndon Wolfe and you have found, thankfully, my audio memoir here for the Mem memories. So glad that you joined. I hope you enjoy this journey down memory lane of some side hustle jobs that I've had over the course of my crazy career Random, silly and somewhat chaotic, hence the title Career Chaos. I've already talked about my nomadic and often hilarious early job experience, marked by poor performance and pranks. Primarily, season 1, Episode 3 chronicles that. Also, my aimless and still aimless career to college trek were touched on in Season 1, episodes 23 and 24, respectively. I encourage you to go back and listen up and find out a little bit about my early career path and its strange and unusual occurrences. What I haven't mentioned were my side hustles along the way. What I haven't mentioned were my side hustles along the way. Many of these, for reasons that will soon be readily apparent, have been withheld from public consumption until now, I think. Okay, I hope I'm prepared for the blowback from what I'm about to divulge. So let me gird up my loins, lose what little discretion I possess and cathart, okay.

Speaker 2: 2:07

When I wasn't bivocationally pastoring small churches, I often pursued other moonlining opportunities to supplement my workforce solutions career, such as the temptation of an open mic. That thrust me into a very brief attempt, attempt at stand-up comedy Using the name I'm spelling here S-H-U-N-D-N-B. The S and theB are in capitals. Shouldn't be is how it's pronounced. Shouldn't be was a brilliant stage name, I must admit. Anyway, I quickly discovered that my terrible sense of timing and inability to construct the incongruous monologue that humor requires rendered me pathetically inept. For five minutes and it seemed like five decades I heard nothing but the sound of my own voice and feet shuffling. It was so horrific I desperately longed for a heckler. The silence was deafening. Also, using that same stage name, if shouldn't be, another open mic lured me into my foray into rap music. There was a decent prize for this particular karaoke competition. It was Nashville, by the way, so I figured the Nashville crowd would be met with some reasonably decent talent. But I was wrong. The competition was brilliant and most had their own CDs available for fans of unknown but soon-to-be-found vocalists. Before running from the dais to vomit, I uttered so few words that a rhyme was impossible. Going forward, the phrase karaoke kills served as a reminder that I was better off as a spectator. That I was better off as a spectator Once while delivering pizzas.

Speaker 2: 3:52

After getting off from my day job I came close to accepting the persistent offer of one of my regulars, the one with the red bandana, To join his club. He creatively called the Bloods. He said I would fit right in and I can make some extra coin by delivering to certain customers a package that he would give me, along, of course, with the pizza. Appearing to me to be a nice enough fellow, the sound business model of double dipping seemed like a terrific way to reduce the balances of my maxed out credit cards. I was going to accept his gracious offer on my next delivery to him, but I was fired before I could return. The store manager misguidedly thought me eating a slice before the drop-off was unacceptable. He also referenced me wearing size 22 shoes to the door when I thought an attractive single woman had placed the order. In my defense, I'd been single myself for several years and not much of a looker or well-to-do, so meeting available, attractive and honest women willing to give me a second glance was difficult, unless I put on those high-top converse boats.

Speaker 2: 5:01

My brief stint as a Chippendale ended abruptly when I was offered dollar bills to leave the building, and I did. Selling church directories was short-lived as well. Arguing theology with the pastor prospect instead of discussing the value proposition of the product was, for some reason unknown to me, frowned upon. With zero credit for even one sale, I was sent on my merry way. That providential termination opened the door to a lucrative entry into my only gig as a foot model. Having always believed my feet to be classic, it seemed like the perfect size, 22 fit but, as fate would have it, an unexpected bout of toe jam led to that career path's demise and, tragically, my hopes of joining the circus never materialized, despite having some brilliant ideas for a novelty act.

Speaker 2: 5:58

Well, it's out there now. I won't tell you where, but there are nuggets of truth hidden in my tall tales. Happy hunting. If I summon up the courage, in a later episode I will attempt to fabricate some more myths, to continue exercising the demons of repressed memories that must be made public. Do you have memories of side hustles or jobs that make you laugh now, ones that you are hesitant to share in front of God and everybody? Surely you do so. Send me a message with one of those stories and I will anonymously broadcast it on every platform I have, along with your name, of course. I'm Lyndon Wolfe and you've been listening to Ear for the Memories, my audio memoir. Glad you stopped by. I hope you're making memories. Come and visit often, it'll be good to see you. Hello friends, glad you stopped by. I hope you're making memories.

Speaker 1: 6:51

Come and visit often. It'll be good to see you. Hello friends, If you appreciate the content and what it takes to create and deliver it, please consider a small contribution. Just go to buymeacoffeecom slash here for the memories. That's buymeacoffeecom slash here for the memories Much appreciated.